I love this song whether Eva Cassidy, Gordon Lightfoot or Joan Baez sings it. And my girl here looks so sad. It's raining again in New England, but truly, I had a nice day. Worked in the journal all day, made peace with an old adversary, and listened to really nice music. So yeah, good day. Why are all my girls wistful, tentative and sad--I
don't know. I'm half Irish and I have a melancholy soul. I love this girl though, and I added the text to get the mood, as if the expression and blue background weren't enough. I love working the journal, now when I hit canvas, I lose courage. It feels less intimate and I freeze up. But I worked differently on this girl--I kept her mid tones identical: warm and just shaded in a back and forth fashion, but primarily stayed warm, sanded back when the values got too dark. You can't listen to Eva Cassidy all day and make a happy portrait. She's great, but oh so achingly sad, and her phrasing is so slow and dramatic. I hope she's in heaven serenading the other angels.

I love pink, pink skies, pink icing on cupcakes, pink fingernails and toe nails and pink mist.

Started with colored pencil, upped the shading with watercolor crayons, acrylic on the hair, water soluble oil pastels on the eyes. Collaged altered photograph of a rose in the pink background. Had fun with this one. Keeping the dark images at bay, staying in the pink as much as I can.

Sitting in the student cafe where I'm taking my courses. Drinking a latte and trying to look like I'm writing the next great American Novel. I really just want to take my art journal and colored pencils and get lost in it. Feel discouraged about certain things in my little corner of the world right now, but I'm trying not to let it bring me down. I find the college kids endearing, yet at the same time annoyingly young, enthusiastic, and good looking. I've got to sit in a class where we're boxed in like sardines and listen to a professor, who is well meaning, but I'm just not checked in to her lectures. Technology in the classroom, learning to use excel, word and create a power point, and a discussion about disabilities. This is a crazy juxtaposition of subject matter, but I'm keeping my mouth shut.
Because with my luck, they'll decide to split the class into two classes and have me here for four afternoons instead of three. They're playing some awesome acoustic music in this cafe, and it is quiet after being in a classroom with little kids for six hours.

I'm taking out my journal.

Say hello to Uncertainty. Taking a stand is tough. Especially when you stand alone, and the stakes are high. Letting go when the costs are steep, and you know may live to regret it. But how much of yourself are you willing to give, blindly, to someone bent on self-destruction? So you get angry, you get frustrated, you get sad. Then you are made to feel badly because you had the nerve to express your own feelings of frustration.

You walk away amid a chorus of blame, with the weight of self-doubt, that will now be your companion, for some time.

Sometimes you have to take a stand.

Sept 17 Stuff

Posting newest picture. Really pleased with this one. Picture is slightly overexposed, but I like the collaging elements, old watercolors and my favorites, deep greens and blues, in the background. I did the portrait with no gesso, sanded the the page and really tried to use the pencil lightly. I also erased some of the colored pencil with sandpaper (220grit) where the values got too dark. Eyes have some acrylic, but tried to create a shadowing effect with some white colored pencil, not highlight so much as a blurred reflective quality of the eyes after acrylic black. Eye color is all colored pencil blues and greens.

Well, finally got some work on the blog. I actually have two canvases that I could add, but I'll stay with the journal entries. Still feeling pretty overwhelmed as one can see from Really Blue Girl, but
I'll hang in. I'm not the only middle aged woman who is back at school and work and trying to manage a family and create. It beats the alternative nothing to do no one to talk to. I miss time to exercise, make dinner and have a glass of wine at the end of the day. Well, wine is giving me a horrendous headache anyhow. But a nice long walk with the ipod is nice.

The kids are adorable at school, but full of energy as always. Some days I feel as though they're getting too young and I'm getting too old. But every year is different, and although this one promises to be challenging, I'm hopefully keeping my head above water and keep my sanity intact.

Crazy, crazy, crazy. This past week has been a whirlwind. Work, class, family all coming before art. I do have a couple of journal pages and a canvas to add. Hope to post tomorrow. Still loving the colored pencil even though I'm still at a trial and error phase. But that's the journey. I am taking a background class and am picking up some nice background techniques. Hope to display more as soon as possible.